


Temperature War

by RatMonarch



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic, Drabble, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Short, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-12-27 15:20:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21120938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RatMonarch/pseuds/RatMonarch
Summary: Shizuo had developed a theory...





	Temperature War

Over the past month, Shizuo had developed a theory. That theory being Izaya, and everyone associated with the flea (excluding himself), was cold-blooded. 

Now hear him out!

He had evidence to back this claim up. It was all observational data, but he found it all compelling. 

It was currently summer in Japan, which of course meant it was hot. But this particular summer was _ ridiculously _ hot. So hot that Shizuo sometimes considered going out with his meager savings and buying new work clothes because the bartender outfits Kasuka had given him were suffocating out in this weather. Meanwhile, Izaya continued to practically prance around Ikebukuro with a fur-trimmed coat on at all times without breaking a sweat. Shizuo didn’t know how he did it. 

But it wasn’t just Izaya. As he mentioned above, everyone associated with the flea dressed like Japan was stuck in a perpetual winter. The flea’s sisters were always wearing hoodies when they were out and about, Shinra was always in a doctor’s outfit, and even the flea’s bitchy secretary wore a turtleneck at all times. Shizuo just didn’t get it. How were all of them not dying of heatstroke? How did no one other than him complain about how Izaya’s apartment felt like a sauna rather than a living space? 

But it wasn’t just their seeming immunity to heat that bothered him. It was also the fact that each and every one of them could feel the slightest dip in temperature as well. If Shizuo so much as moved the thermostat five degrees, then a whole cacophony of bitching would begin. Just a five degree difference was enough to make everyone act like Jack Frost himself had entered the room and froze it over. And unfortunately, when everyone besides Shizuo was complaining about the temperature, it didn’t take a super sleuth informant like Izaya to deduce who fiddled with the thermostat. 

Once found out, the thermostat would always go back to the original temperature, Shizuo would continue to feel like he was in an oven, all while Izaya would lecture him and accuse him of trying to freeze him out of the apartment. It was miserable. 

But Shizuo had been testing another theory out. This one required patience, as it was a very slow process, spanning over several days, but Shizuo was proud to say it had been producing results. The solution to his problem was so simple. All he had to do was nudge the thermostat one or two degrees cooler - something so subtle not even Izaya or anyone he was associated with would even notice. He would just do that everyday until they were at a reasonable temperature. 

To be perfectly honest, he was surprised at just how _ well _ his plan was coming along. He’d expected Izaya to call him out on it Day One, but the flea had just kept going about business as usual. It was great. The temperature was gradually getting lower and lower, to the point where Shizuo didn’t dread walking into Izaya’s apartment. But it wasn’t just the improving temperatures he was proud of. It was the fact that he, Shizuo Heiwajima, actually managed to sneak something past Izaya’s nose! 

… Or so he had thought. That little delusion was shattered one night as the two of them were watching television. He’d noticed as the program went on, Izaya kept scooching closer and closer until he was practically sitting on Shizuo’s lap.

“The fuck you doing, flea?” Shizuo had asked, with no real heat to his words. He wasn’t going to necessarily complain about Izaya being more affectionate, but it _ was _ rather rare that Izaya would be so blatant. He usually liked to play a mind game or two about what he wanted. 

Izaya had given him an annoyed look, before saying, “If you’re going to be cruel enough to freeze me out of my own apartment, the least you can do is keep me warm, Shizu-chan.”

Ah, so Izaya had figured it out at some point. For all he knew, Izaya had known from the very beginning. The flea did have a sixth-sense for this kind of a thing after all. 

But if _ this _ was his punishment, he’d happily accept the consequences. Pulling the flea closer, Shizuo wrapped an arm around a pouting Izaya’s with a smirk, saying, “I think I can do that.”

**Author's Note:**

> I came up with this idea a long time ago, but what inspired me to write it is the temperature battle I've been having with myself in this apartment. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed, and as always, critique is appreciated. 
> 
> Have an amazing day!


End file.
